If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize