it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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