it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
