I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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