Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
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