whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize