are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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