Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize