hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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