You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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