It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I could fuck to npr.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Randomize