Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
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