my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Rumble strips road head = magical
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
