Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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