You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
