How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Sext me about skeletons
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
