Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
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