Just fell off a train. Bad.
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize