You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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