Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
