And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
