Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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