he looks like a really good dad on facebook
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
