Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Ambien. No doubt about it.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize