Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
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