i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
