spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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