And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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