she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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