She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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