Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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