How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
