I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
