I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I'm just crazy horny about you
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
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