do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Floor bacon is actually really good
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
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