oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
