Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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