If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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