It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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