Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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