I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
