There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Pants are for mortals
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
