I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
