hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Randomize