I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
