Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
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