Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
