actually, I'm a sock model
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Randomize