butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
