We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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