i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
